Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Hiatus

So I guess I have some race reports to catch up on - Mercer Cup and Whitmore's -but before I do, I gotta vent about something (warning, profanitly laced post).

I've spent many hours of my life in gyms and gym locker rooms. I understand that a locker room is a place for getting naked. However, many guys take this freedom too, too far. And its always the old, really fat, really hairy, utterly disgusting guys. Not that being fat and really hairy makes you disgusting, cause I am quite hairy and was once very fat, its your actions when you happen to have those characteristics. Let me explain.

When you change in the locker room, its OK to get naked, then put on your workout clothing or street clothes, whatever. The only other place you should buck naked is in the shower and MAYBE the scale. There is no walking around, walking to the shower, combing your hair in front of the mirror, or doing calisthenics naked!

I always see these old fat bastards with their tiny shriveled little penis heads barely protruding from the fat enveloping their waste waddling around making it obvious they want everyone there to see how comfortable they are being naked. Now, you are probably saying, "Dude, why are you looking close enough to notice that their tiny dicks barely stick out from their lard?" Well my answer is this - when you watch Apes fuck on the Discovery channel, its not dirty cause they are apes, though it still makes you feel uneasy like there is something wrong with you for watching...but ultimately you learn something, so its OK.

Last night some FPOS (fat piece of shit) walked to the shower naked with his towel in his hand at his side. DUDE! You have the towel right there! Just wrap that shit up! Then to further make me want to spoon my eyes out, he comes back from the shower dripping wet. He couldn't even towel off at the shower. He got back to his locker and started to dry off, making sure to put one leg up on the bench and spread his ass so he could dry out down below.

I've seen guys do full stretch routines naked, talk to their buddies while sitting Indian style and scratch their ass and grunt in front of the mirror completely fucking naked with no regard for their fellow man.

My question is this - what makes these old fat dudes do this? My best guess is that they feel so emasculated in every other aspect of there life- whether it be at work getting yelled at by their younger and smarter boss, getting yelled at by their wife while not ever getting any ass, or watching their stock broker take all the money - that they have to somehow assert that they are, in fact, all that is man.

But the truth is, a man knows when to not shove his shit in another man's face. You never see the truly ripped, Adonis looking guys who are dedicated to their fitness and physique doing that unnecessary bullshit.

There is a time and place for whipping it out. Right Turner?

2 comments:

ridin at 4:20 said...

The gym locker room is one scary place. I used to see guys in front of the sink, buck naked and shaving. Do they not have their own bathrooms at home?

Years ago, I tought spinning at a gym that was full of middle aged men. They'd sit in the lockeroom and bitch about their ex-wives all day. I wonder why?

I taught at another gym for a few off-seasons and I'd use the pool two days a week. Usually, I'd get there and the lockeroom would be empty, so I'd pick a locker. As my luck goes, I hear the door open from the pool and in walks some fat dude soaking wet and his locker is right next to the one I picked. Just my luck.

The sign would say "Please shower before entering pool" Yeah right. Like I was going in there.

Erik said...

you mean to link to this?
http://etzepplin.blogspot.com/2006/11/naked-men.html

And I'm all with you man. Those fat bastards.

....where are your race reports though, bitch??